“I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to the one hope that belongs to your call—one Lord, one faith, one baptism, one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.” Ephesians 4:1–6
Biblical gentleness
Gentleness, in Baker’s Evangelical Dictionary of Biblical Theology, is defined as this: “Sensitivity of disposition and kindness of behavior, founded on strength and prompted by love.”
Many of us assume gentleness to be passive, as well as meek. In our day and age, it’s generally associated with weakness—especially in men. It’s thought of as a quiet, timid quality reserved for mothers and the overly compassionate.
But that’s not what we see in these verses.
Biblical gentleness is not weak and is not about being pushed around. It requires the truth and humility to love somebody where they are. Gentle people do not water down the truth, and while they do not use harsh words, they often use hard words presented with love. This means we in the church must make a real effort to understand the predispositions and presumptions of others, humbly loving others, and knowing them before we speak with gentleness and concern.
True gentleness is never self-seeking—it is for God’s glory. Real gentleness isn’t passive, but it is patient. It means “bearing with one another in love,” fighting for peace, and seeking reconciliation and restoration.
God begins with gentleness
When we are gentle, we will accept God’s dealing with us as good, for his glory.
We will not dispute or resist God’s discipline for us, as we understand that gentleness is born out of God’s power and is for our good. This is how we can be gentle with others: We must first know and understand how God is gentle with us.
God begins with gentleness, by making us male and female in his image. He did not see it fit for man to be alone so he gently perfected us as image bearers by creating female from male. It was in his gentleness that he rebuked us and locked us out of the garden so we would not eat of the tree of life and live in sin and death for eternity. God hates sin and is gentle with us about it, so gentle that he showed us how much he hates sin by giving up his own Son to death for our sake. It was gentle, kind, and merciful of him to provide Jesus as a fulfillment of the law when we deserved death. We who are believers now see God as gentle with us, because of his love for his Son who has made provision for a spotless unblemished bride, his church.
That is power. That is humility. That is gentleness.
Jesus, help me to love my family and others with the kind of gentleness that you have loved me. The one who takes the wrath and scorns the shame of crucifixion so that others will know and see your love, might, and glory. You could have punished me, and you could rebuke me in anger for my sin, but you instead show me what sin deserves and then you gave the deserved punishment to your Son. I love you. Thank you for your gentleness.
